I'm sick and tired

I wish I had an EASY relationship - one that was without frustration and hurt.

But I don't suppose those exist, do they?

In any case, I'm tired of feeling selfish and mean.

I'm pretty sure I lack the ability to be in a healthy relationship. On one hand, I want to be alone for forever. On the other hand, there's nothing more that I crave than true companionship.

In Between

Finally finished college...I'm leaving Tuesday to drive to San Francisco, then my career starts on June 7th, just days after I get back.

LOTS to do tomorrow, but my bags are basically packed. Hard to believe I'll be leaving so soon.

One thing before I crash - today's horoscope said this: Your appeal for help will be heeded by a friend who won't hesitate to take risks in order to get you out of a jam; no matter what people can think, true wonderful friendship does exist in this world.



:-)

It's Over I guess

I've wasted the last hour trying to figure out any possible way that my GPA would work out OK - there's no possible way. I have to accept it or it's going to be incredibly hard to look at my posted grades tomorrow morning. I should've just packed.

So it's over. Doesn't feel over. Well, some things do. The campus doesn't feel like mine anymore. I guess I destroyed the one friendship I had left here.

I wish I had been able to accomplish my goal. It's hard to feel proud of myself when I was so close but didn't make it.



I guess I just hope the next few days go quickly and painlessly - I'm not sure what I need, but I know it's not here.

I hate moving. Even when I want to move. It leaves me feeling exhausted and homeless.

One last day

Sing me a lullaby...

that's what I want.

In Just 4 Days

In 4 days, I will graduate with a degree in education.


Looking over my work for my upcoming job, we're discussing how to plan purposefully, get students invested in their own schoolwork, and how to execute our plans effectively.

It's the first time in 4 years I have EVER even thought about that sort of thing, never mind talked about it in classes.




How is that considered an education? How is it possible that the only reason I'm learning these things are that I am joining this other program on my own?

It scares me for the future of education.

Who I am is gone

only have I was

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getawaygetaway

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ihate you all

i HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU

GET AWAY FROM ME GET AWAY

I WILL DESTROY

I WANT TO DESTROY

IT
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