Full Moon

Today I got a glimpse at what my life could have been had a chosen a different path (small digression - what the heck kind of a word is "could", and why don't we pronounce the L?? I looked at it, and thought I had spelled it wrong for a second...very strange).

I thought about it for a long while, and wondered if I regret the decision I made.

And then I realized - I made that decision with the best information I had at the time. I made that decision, and for a long time I never would (there's another weird word!! sheesh!) have questioned the goodness of it.

I also realized that I have come to be a very specific type of person through my decision...and if I hadn't made it, well, I wouldn't be the person I am today. I do wonder if that's a good thing sometimes...

But then I acknowledge that I have always only ever done the best I can. I know I'm scared of what's to come; I know I'm worried that I won't be happy in the future. But maybe if I just...stick with those little things that make me happy, the big things that make me happy will come my way too.

I'll never regret those things that I have done with good intentions.

I can't continue to lose hope, faith, trust, and confidence in myself - I need those now more than ever. And if I don't believe in myself, how will other people? I am strong...I WILL persevere.

I will not simply exist...I will LIVE!!!!


...Thus begins another week.